How to Myths About Online Dating

Online dating gets a pretty bad rap sometimes, but how much of that is really deserved? The truth is that there’s a lot of bad info out there about dating online, and some of what you probably have heard may not be true. That’s why we’ve put together a list of some of the most common online dating myths to set the record straight once and for all.

[Edit]Steps

[Edit]Myth: Online dating is just for finding hook ups.

1. Fact: Many people date online exclusively to find a long-term partner. A lot of people turn to online dating because they’re specifically looking for a committed partner.^[1] One of the benefits of online dating is that you can say what you’re looking for in your profile. If you want a committed relationship, online dating lets you easily search for other people who want the same.^[2]
   
   • With that said, if you want to use online dating exclusively for hookups, you can!
   • Roughly 12% of all couples in a committed relationship (married or long-term dating) first met online. That doesn’t seem like much, but considering the fact that online dating has only been around for 20 years or so, that’s a lot of happy couples!^[3]

[Edit]Myth: Online dating is desperate.

1. Fact: There’s nothing desperate about dating online. The four most common motivations for online dating are love, hookups, self-esteem enhancement, and boredom.^[4] You’ll note that desperation is not listed here. Plus, online dating is the single most popular way couples meet these days, so it’s definitely not a “last ditch” option for most people.^[5]
   
   • Never feel ashamed for looking for love online. Tons of people do it, and a lot of those people do end up finding the love of their life!

[Edit]Myth: Couples who meet online don’t last.

1. Fact: There’s no evidence that this is the case. Relationships that start online aren’t radically different than other relationships. There’s no reason you can’t have a long, healthy relationship with someone you meet online. There isn’t any evidence that couples who meet online are more likely to fail.^[6]
   
   • The things that make traditional relationships work (communication, conflict resolution, respect, etc.) are the same things that make relationships that started online work.^[7]

[Edit]Myth: Online dating requires too much work.

1. Fact: Online dating is easier than other options in a lot of ways. If you go out to the bar looking to meet someone, you’re probably only going to see a dozen or so potential people. You can scan hundreds of profiles from your couch if you’re dating online, though. Going out on dates with people you meet online can feel like a lot of work, but it’s still usually easier than going out and trying to meet people in person.
   
   • This is reflected in the data. Most online daters say it was relatively easy for them to find someone they found attractive and who they shared common interests with online.^[8]

[Edit]Myth: You can’t trust people’s photos on dating apps.

1. Fact: The majority of online dating profile photos are accurate. If you’re worried that everyone lies about what they look like on dating apps and websites, don’t be. While there are always going to be cases where people put up deceiving photos, roughly two-thirds of online dating photos accurately reflect the person they’re supposed to represent.^[9] You’re more likely to go on a date with someone who looks like their photos than someone who doesn’t.
   
   • You might want to avoid profiles with only 1-2 photos on them if you’re worried about the images being accurate. The more photos someone has on their profile, the less likely it is that they’re being deceiving.

[Edit]Myth: Online dating is never safe.

1. Fact: There are steps you can take to make sure you’re being safe. Online dating isn’t more dangerous than traditional forms of dating as long as you follow some basic safety precautions. When it comes to meeting someone you met online, make sure that you arrange to meet in a highly-visible, public space. Look the person up online ahead of time, and don’t go home with them after one date.^[10] As long as you take these precautions and stay vigilant, online dating can be a safe, enjoyable way to meet people.
   

[Edit]Myth: Dating apps are ruining traditional dating.

1. Fact: Traditional dating was slowing down well before the dating apps. Historically, most people have met their future partner through family or friends. This has been in decline since World War 2! Traditional ways of meeting people have been in an even steeper decline since 1994, which is well before sites like Tinder and eHarmony existed.^[11]
   
   • Many people find online dating a lot easier than meeting someone at a bar or other public place. On top of that, most people have a positive experience with online dating, so they don’t see a real reason to go back to finding potential dates in-person.^[12]

[Edit]References

1. ↑ https://www.cnn.com/2020/12/31/europe/dating-apps-relationships-intl-scli-scn/index.html
2. ↑ [v160997_b02]. 15 April 2019.
3. ↑ https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/02/06/10-facts-about-americans-and-online-dating/
4. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6174578/
5. ↑ https://news.stanford.edu/2019/08/21/online-dating-popular-way-u-s-couples-meet/
6. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3690854/
7. ↑ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12216701/
8. ↑ https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2020/02/06/the-virtues-and-downsides-of-online-dating/
9. ↑ https://sml.stanford.edu/ml/2009/06/hancock-cr-putting-your-best-face-forward.pdf
10. ↑ https://www.rainn.org/articles/online-dating-and-dating-app-safety-tips
11. ↑ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6731751/
12. ↑ https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/02/06/10-facts-about-americans-and-online-dating/